Seattle Subsonic

Inside the Mouth of the Reptile

February 6th, 2009

We need to take into consideration “who” owns the Crocodile. Marcus can call in whoever he wants for opening night… but the publicly named financiers are Susan Silver and Sean Kinney.It is quite possible, since they were there for such moments when REM, The Beastie Boys and that little band called ‘Nirvana’ graced the stage that they would be looking at the Croc to be landmark on a national level.
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There is a very public rumor going around that the CROC will ONLY be open for show nights, that bartenders from other venues will be scheduled in for show nights, that OFF nights will service as a pizza joint… Like I said, a lot of rumors. Will the rumors be substantiated? No, because a rumor ‘not clarified’ travels farther. Since the public relations are keeping very close to the belt on this… everyone is talking but no one is saying a thing. But we all know, ‘the CROC is reopening’.
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But lets be real, they just spent a butt load of cash putting this thing together… would they make more money playing three nights of Alice in Chains (Susan Manages them and Sean sits behind the drum set), Mudhoney or even Pearl Jam… or one night of the Fleet Foxes. In defense of the owners interests, they are used to making national splashes when they involve themselves in projects. I doubt the first few weeks will be more then just key spots and public perception. A destination point while visiting Seattle, like any bar, it’s all about the alcohol sales… we all know that.
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I may be wrong, but I worked with venues in Chicago for years and… well… the Croc’s marketing and ’super secret’ publicity is suspiciously familiar.
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I was talking to a friends of mine at Alternative Press the other day and he specifically questioned about the CROC reopening. I told his that it was gonna be an anamatronic theme venue, like chunky cheese pizza time theater. It will be a seattle legends robot show. All dead rock legends robotically perfected to JAM together for an hour and a half every night… narrated by Bill Gates and sponsored by Mircosoft Xbox Guitar hero. At the end of the show Jimi and Kurt will match guitar flames as white smoke representing ’speaker cabinet explosions’ burts into the air and confetti falls from the ceiling as the looming shadow of Courtney Love waits in the wings.
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He didn’t buy it…

So… to all you profiteers or war, you vultures waiting to pick bones and judge, you cast asides with your mullets and autographed Queensryche vinyl… we know no more today then yesterday… but the Croc is reopening next month.